Posted in In My Opinion...

For you are Standing on Holy Ground…

“Do not come any closer,” the LORD warned. “Take off your sandals, for you are standing on holy ground.”

-Exodus 3:5(NLV)

This verse follows Moses seeing the burning bush and hearing God call out to him. As Moses began to approach the burning bush, God calls out, “Do not come any closer…. Take off your sandals, for you are standing on holy ground.” The message of removing sandals upon the entrance of holy ground is found in both the Old Testament and the New Testament.

Churches in the east, especially Eastern Orthodox churches, usually have a sign posted outside the church asking for visitors to remove their shoes. Some will quote this very Bible verse in one translation or another. Churches in the west have seemed to abandon this practice. In fact, many church circles see it as disrespectful to remove one’s shoes in the church.

I am a girl of many flip-flops. I really have enough to change my flip-flops depending on my outfit (I am just too lazy to do so). I also am more likely to be found carrying my flip-flops than I am to be actually wearing them. When sitting in the pew, I always take my shoes off and move them to the side. This carries on to when I preach and or am helping lead worship in some way. I take my shoes off and either leave them behind the pulpit or under the first pew depending on where I am and the set up of the worship space.

Why do I prefer to be barefoot in church? It all goes straight back to the verse in Exodus. “Take off your sandals, for you are standing on holy ground.” For me this is a little more literal being an avid flip-flop wearer. I choose to not wear my shoes in church because for me the church is holy ground. The church is not the only place of holy ground but it is indeed holy ground.

Do I believe that the west does it wrong because this is not a common practice? Absolutely not. I do not think there is a right or wrong practice for wearing shoes in church. What I do believe is that there are ways to make a space more guided towards God during worship, and for me, personally, I find removing my shoes to be just one way to guide my attention towards God in worship.

 

Posted in In My Opinion...

Self-harm doesn’t mean suicidal

A very common misconception is that a person who self-harms is suicidal. While a person who has suicidal tendencies may have a history of self-harm, there is not a direct correlation between self-harm and suicidal tendencies. Actually the core motivation behind the two are actually quite different.

Those who self-harm do so for various reasons: to feel again, to punish themselves, or to release all the feelings they have bottled up inside. All of these come from a desire to cope with whatever it is they are experiencing. In fact, recently they have changed self-harm language to NSSI (Non-suicidal self injury). Here it is literally in the name not suicidal.

Those who do experience suicidal tendencies have a distorted view of what the future looks like and do not see an end to whatever it is they are experiencing. There is no desire to cope because they do not see any other way. Suicidal tendencies are not a coping mechanism; they are a way out.

Assuming everyone who self-harms is suicidal is not only wrong but it can be incredibly dangerous. The reason why a person is harming themselves and the emotions they are experiencing are tossed to the wayside while they are interrogated about suicidal thoughts. Leaving a person in their discomfort and inability to cope healthily can lead to feeling there is no way out, but it can be prevented from getting that far.

**Trigger warning**Story of how I have experienced people convinced self-harm is suicidal**

 

I started down the road of self-harm at about the average age of 13. It was not until high school that people began to realize that I was coping through self-harm. The excuses were not lining up with the type of injury and the frequency set off some flags.

I mainly scratched at my skin until it bleed, but that didn’t always provide the necessary relief. it also caused quite a bit more scaring than when I experimented with other tactics. Once I started college I realized that I wasn’t coping healthily and began to reach out for help.

It was when I started reaching out for help that I was meant with people relating self-harm to a sin because I was purposely maiming the temple of God. Those who weren’t condemning me wouldn’t believe me that I wasn’t suicidal. They were throwing readings at me that told me that I was looking for death because I was cutting. Wrong, wrong, wrong.

For me I cut to gain control. I cut to release the mass of emotions that build up inside of me. I cut because I cannot get myself out of the spiral of thoughts. I cut so I can get outside of these feelings and move back to the happiness I was at before all this happened. I cut so I can move on.

Please note I am not validating those who cut. I am not saying that it is something you should do. Please know that cutting is an unhealthy way to cope, but it is a coping mechanism for so many. Those who cut do need help finding new ways to cope. Healthier ways to gain control of themselves and the emotions that have completely flooded their systems.

Please know if you have not reached out to someone, I am here. Send me an email, message me on social media, comment. Whatever it is that you feel comfortable with. I am here for you and so are so many others. You are loved!

Posted in In My Opinion...

If I could be anywhere…

If I could choose to be anywhere, then I would choose to be exactly where I am, Perkins School of Theology. Why would I not choose some exotic place that I have never been before? Well, I plan on telling you just that.

Perkins is not a place I prayed I would end up one day. My life goals had changed so quickly and frequently I didn’t really have a plan beyond college. When I realized I needed and wanted to go to graduate school, I began to panic. Applications didn’t make me feel any better about the process. Perkins came highly recommended from a trusted friend, oh, and the application didn’t stress me out. Perkins ended up being the only place I applied.

I had a summer position lined up and all thoughts of Texas seemed to be so far away. The closer it became, the more nervous I became. Then came time to leave PA. I was a nervous wreck. Hours before I left I told my mom I didn’t want to go. The further away from PA I got, the less likely I would be to turn around. I finally made it it Texas and I only felt like I had made a huge mistake.

The feeling of making a mistake quadrupled at orientation. Everyone seemed so positive and sure Perkins is where they were supposed to be, but I shared none of those feelings. So now you are really curious why I chose Perkins out of all the places in the world, right? Be patient.

Orientation was also the beginning of realizing Perkins was exactly where I was meant to be. As the year faucet was turned on full blast, I sought out the first official person I could find to tell them this wasn’t it and I was going home. However, the person I chose was not willing to see me go and not in a typical concern of losing numbers king of way. She genuinely wanted me at Perkins. Why? She didn’t even know me.

This is how Perkins is, a family. The Perkins hug is real. From day one (of classes that is, orientation was rough), the people at Perkins have been the definition of a caring community. We laugh together and cry together. We study together and find solace in not doing our work together. However, this doesn’t stop when we leave the classroom. We have get-togethers and meet frequently for meals.

The fellow students are only a part of what makes this such an amazing community. The professors and other faculty create the space for this to occur. They are here for more than making sure we succeed academically. They are invested in our lives and want us to succeed in finding and pursuing our passions. They celebrate with us and mourn with us. They are here with us.

Leaving everyone behind in PA, including my support system, was an extremely difficult situation for me. However, I now feel so at home at Perkins and among all the people there. As much as I miss everyone in PA, I am so happy to be with everyone here in Texas.

Perkins is where the coffee is always flowing, the tissues are being handed over, and conversations about theology happen even on a Galentine’s Day outing (which ended at a coffee shop studying). Perkins is the place where your professors and faculty purchase your book and are so excited to walk this path with you. Perkins is where you aren’t afraid to walk into an office bawling or shouting about an awkward moment you just encountered. Perkins is where you get to pursue your passions in a completely supportive environment with a bounty of resources.

Perkins is where I would choose to be right now.

Posted in Reflections

Reckless Love- Cory Asbury

Before we could form words, God knew what we would say. Before we took our first breath, God was breathing for us. God has been good to us before we even could recognize God’s goodness. This is the reckless love of God.

When we are straying from the path God wills us to be on, it is God who is chasing after us. Even in our unworthiness, God has paid the ultimate price for each of us. This is the reckless love of God.

This reckless love of God is God’s continual pursuit of each one of us. It is a love that never ends. This love is for each of us as if we were the only ones. Nothing can come between us and the love of God. All of the barriers are defeated by God. This is the reckless love of God.

What walls have been knocked down in God’s pursuit of you?

Posted in Reflections

The God Who Stays- Matthew West

 When the going gets tough, we find it hard to believe God hasn’t given up on us. We find it hard to believe because we feel like giving up on ourselves. When we feel broken, we don’t see the reason of pushing on nor do we see the possibility of being fixed again. God is the God who stays.

We tend to feel ashamed and we hide from the people around us. We attempt to hide from God as well, but it is not possible to hide from God. If you have tried, you know this is true. God is the God who stays.

The truth is that nothing can separate us from the love of God (Romans 8:38-39). Nothing we have done, said, or thought can separate us from the love of God. No one has the power to remove us from the presence of God. No matter how hard we try to hide from God, God is still there. God is the God who stays.

God is the God who stays. God is always welcoming us with open arms. God is there even when we feel the most alone. God is always reminding us that nothing can separate us from God’s love. God is the God who stays.

How do you know God is the God who stays?

Posted in Reflections

New Wine-Hillsong Worship

Making new wine comes from pressing and crushing. Breaking new ground comes from the act of surrendering. Neither of these processes are promised to be easy, but they always prove worthy in the end. Surrendering ourselves to the hand of God requires much trust. A trust that we know as faith.

Surrendering ourselves to God means offering ourselves up to align ourselves with the will of God. We become a vessel through which God works here on earth We admit that without God we are nothing and become full when we have God.

When we allow ourselves to become new wine, we are empowered through the Holy Spirit and freed from our hold to sin. The old passes away and we walk away holding the flame of Christ. A light that cannot be overcome.

When we have this flame we will be forever singing praises to the Lord. We will be placing ourselves back on the altar. The process of becoming new wine is an on-going process. A process that continually brings us closer to God.

Are you surrendering yourself to be made into new wine?

Posted in Devotion

New Year, New Me?

So if anyone is in Christ, there is a new creation: everything old has passed away; see, everything has become new! All of this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation.

2 Corinthians 5:17-18

The time leading up to the New Year is filled with reflecting on the past year and planning on making the New Year even better by creating resolutions. We think resolutions to eat healthy, work-out more, or declutter our lives will create a new us. However, most of these plans fail before January ends.

This review of the past can also be dangerous. Focusing on the past does not allow for us to be in the present moment. We are not able to see what God is doing in the here and now because we are focusing on what God has or has not done in the last year.

The past can be improved. The story is yours to write. However, this can be done at any point. We do not need the New Year to decide to do what is best for ourselves. There is no New Year, New Me. The way we become new is not the hours between December 31st and January 1st.

We become new in Jesus. In our relationship with Jesus, we are reconciled with God. The old versions of ourselves pass away and we become new in Christ Jesus. There is no need for resolutions or unmet goals. There is only a need for preparing room in our hearts.

As the New Year greets us, do you have room in your heart for Jesus?

Posted in Devotion

The Prince of Peace

For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Of the greatness of his government and peace there will be no end.

Isaiah 9:6-7

Christmas is not all joyful and stress free for everyone. The stress of seeing family, of having money for the best presents, the anxiety the day brings and so much more cause this day to be less than joyful. However, unto us a child is born, a child who will be called Prince of Peace.

Peace. Christmas doesn’t seem so peaceful all the time. But peace is not a promise that things will be good all the time. Peace is knowing that even admits the bad that there will be good that comes later.

As you celebrate with your families and friends this holiday season I hope you are able to have peace. A feeling that no matter how this season plays out that good is coming. God is with each and every single one of you! God is never going to leave you.

The Prince of Peace has been given to you to remember to accept this peace into your hearts. Do you have peace in your hearts this holiday season?

Prayer: Almighty God, we thank you for the Son that you have given us on that first Christmas night. That you didn’t want to be without us, so you made sure you never were. Grant us peace this Christmas season and the days to come. In Jesus name, Amen.

Posted in Uncategorized

Thanksgiving Chaos

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him

Colossians 3:17

We have made it to the beginning of the craziness of the Holiday season. Some may have already been traveling or had various events, but tomorrow is the first of the two holidays that end the year.

Gathering as family, friends, strangers in thankfulness. Or at least we are supposed to. Lots of times, these gatherings bring together broken families in fragmented ways, create spaces of fighting and anxiety, or can be the most dreaded times.

This year as the gatherings take place, I invite you to take care of yourself. Set the boundaries you need to set. Ignore the questions that everyone asks every year that make you grind your teeth.

Please know you are not alone this holiday season as you begin to sink down the spiral of mental health struggles. If you need to reach out, please comment on here or reach out to your support system.

I am rooting you on as you conquer this holiday season. Please do take time to enjoy something from the day! The food, seeing someone you haven’t seen in forever, a conversation, getting rest.

My prayer for you: Lord. Holidays can be rough. We go through them every year but sometimes the struggles get to be too much. The people we’ve lost this year, the people we try to protect ourselves from, the food that everyone expects us to eat. Lord I ask that You be with each and every person that struggles on the holidays. Let Your presence be what draws them through. We are thankful for You Lord. Amen.

Posted in Awards

Sunshine Blogger Award

I was nominated by Beverley. Beverley was one of the first followers way back when Anxious Devotions for Anxious Christians was just a baby and I had no idea what I was doing. She has stayed for the long haul and that makes this nomination so much more meaningful!

If you have not read anything over at Becoming the Oil and Wine, I definitely recommend it! The love of God and power of her words will have you growing in your faith.

Thanks again for this nomination.

What is the Sunshine Blogger Award?

“The Blogosphere community holds several awards that bloggers use to nominate a blog in appreciation for its creative, inspiring, or motivational content.”

“The award also helps other bloggers receive recognition and free exposure for their blogs.”

Award’s Rules

There are some basic rules to follow if you decide to participate:

  • Thank the blogger who nominated you and link their blog so everyone can visit.
  • Answer the 11 questions asked by the blogger who nominated you.
  • Nominate 11 other bloggers and ask them 11 new questions.
  • Notify the nominees by commenting on their blog post.
  • List the rules and display the Award logo on your blog post.

Eleven Questions from Beverley

1. How old is your blog now?

A little under two years old. We hit two years in March 2020.

2. What do you enjoy most about blogging?

I love being able to connect with other people. I love that my writing is able to touch others and still have impact on myself as well. I love watching other people’s blog develop as well!

3. How important do you think Social Media is for the success of a blog?

I just recently made sure that my blog had social media presence on all the major social media platforms, and I have definitely seen an increase on my blog traffic already. However, it doesn’t change the fact that I had a very stable set of followers before I had any social media presence.

4. How would you define a successful blog? In other words, what do think a successful blog looks like? 

For me, I think that a successful blog looks like having a stable set of followers or a community that is able to give each other feedback and support. There is no number that defines this. I am thankful for those that fall into that area for me.

5. Describe your feelings when you received your first blogging award nomination.

I received my first blogging award nomination less than a month after starting my blog. I was so honored to think that in such a short amount of time that someone felt that my blog was worthy of a nomination. It really affirmed my calling to be a voice for others in the form of a blog. As does this nomination.

6. Have you ever thought about monetizing your blog?

I have kind of thought about it but not in depth. I really want my blog to continue being accessible to as many people as possible, and I don’t think that I need to earn money for what I am saying in my blog. I am not doing it for money I guess is what I am saying.

7. If so, what do you think is the best method of monetizing? 

For me, I am using my blog for inspiration in the devotional that I am currently working on which will be out middle of next year.

8. What kind of post do you find easiest or most enjoyable to write?

I love writing the weekly devotionals. Wrestling with the text, finding how to make it resonate with the most people, and sharing it for others is a very enjoyable process for me.

9. What do you think is best, long or short posts?

I try to fall somewhere in between. I find that with short posts people are left wanting more, but with long posts it can be difficult to keep people’s interest the whole way to the end. I also think it depends on the content of the post as well.

10. Funny/Weird Question: What is the weirdest thing you have ever eaten?

The weirdest thing that I have ever eaten is a bug in Australia. It kind of tasted like a sour lemon candy thing, but it also made my mouth kind of go numb. (Do not worry, our tour guide told me it was safe before I ate it… I don’t just pick up bugs and eat them hoping for the best, haha!)

11. What is your favourite way to unwind after a hectic day?

My favorite way to unwind after a hectic day is to make some hot tea, grab my weighted-blanket, and sit on the couch watching whatever show I am currently binge watching on Netflix or read whatever book I am currently obsessed with.

My Nominations:

1. Just My Thoughts

2. Mental Health @ Home

3. Bournemouth Girl

4.  I’m With Him

5.  Beckie’s Mental Mess

6.  Living With Mental Health

7. Pure Glory

8. Michelle

9. The Talking Bloggerac

10. The Godly Chic Diaries

11.A blonde in the crowd

These bloggers’ posts are encouraging and I am blessed by them.

Congratulations to the new nominees!

My Questions for the Nominees:

  1. What was your inspiration to start blogging?
  2. When did you start blogging?
  3. From when you started blogging till now, how has your blog changed?
  4. Do you have a favorite of your own posts?
  5. Where do you want your blog to be in 5 years?
  6. Where is one place in the world you want to travel to?
  7. What does your writing process look like?
  8. What is your favorite part of blogging?
  9. Do you have someone you look up to in the blogging world? (if not outside of the blogging world)
  10. How do you practice self-care?
  11. If you had the time and resources to do anything right now… what would it be?

Thanks again to Beverley for the nomination! Thank you all for reading! I hope you all check out all the linked blogs in this post!

To my nominees, keep up the great work!